I tend to write a lot of posts and for one reason or another put them in drafts with the intension  to share and never actually do. This was one I obviously wrote before heading off to the adventure I am on now. I just found it again and felt like I should share it.

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Welp, in just a few short days (yikes) I am off to the others side of the world, the land down under, Australia! I am headed with a one way ticket, a work visa, and my usual curious spirit.

So, thats happening, but I thought I would share the months prior and how this whole trip ended up coming into reality.

Traveling is not a easy, breezy thing that just happens and poof you are in a paradise with not a worry in the world. Actually its quite the opposite, traveling is probably the most stressful thing in my life. It stretches me and sometimes I think, it would be so much easier just to stay home and be where things are comfortable, then I remember, the thrill of being in a new place, seeing things some will never see, meeting people you would never meet otherwise, and just the over all awe of being in a place you have only dreamed about, experiencing life on a new level, and being transformed to the person you never thought you would be but the person you have only hoped to become.

Preparing for this trip has been nothing short of stressful. 2 of my friends were making this trip, and basically I decided to join them. We started making plans this summer. Well, about September came and things started to get serious, decisions needed to be made and plane tickets needed to be bought. I had a feeling that I needed to just wait and really seek the Lord about this. I didn’t feel that I wasn’t supposed to go, I didn’t feel that I was, I just wasn’t sure what it was.

What felt like forever my prayer was, Lord, open doors that need to be opened and close doors that need to be closed.  Let me not sugar coat this, I was frustrated. I was almost angry that I wasn’t getting answers, silence was not the answer I was looking for. At this point I was okay with a no, I just wanted anything. But I didn’t feel like it was a no, I didn’t give up. I continued to seek and soon felt more peace and felt the need to move forward still with no clear answer.

I decided to set a date and book the ticket. December 9th was the date for departure and at this point it was about a month before, so November 9th ish. It should also be noted, one of my biggest reserves about going into this trip was money, I knew Australia was expensive, and I was worried the money I had saved at this point may be depleted by the time I buy a plane ticket and Visa.

(Let me preface this. A lot of people ask how I afford to travel. Except my DTS in 2013, I have fully funded them myself. I have worked up to 3 jobs at a time to make money and save it all to be able to travel. This is NOT to brag but a thing that is some what important to the story.)

My father has been saving change in a 5 gallon bucket for a few years now, the change had almost reached the top when he told me that he wanted to give me however much money happened to be in the bucket. Now, not being a fool, I knew there was a lot of money in the bucket, I was guessing anywhere form $1,000 to $2,000. My father is a very generous man and it is just in his nature. I was humbled that he wanted to give me money that he has been collecting for years, and also a little hesitant because being the independent person I am, I wanted to fund this trip myself.

The ticket was bought and another family member wanted to donate money to the cause, just because. Again, so humbled and honored because I didn’t ask for this or expect it in the least. We then cash all the change in the 5 gallon bucket. The total ended up being $1,800.

The remaining money I owed on the plane ticket was $1,000 after what a family member had donated.

Then it came to buying the Visa, what I expected to be $5oo ended up being $800. I was almost in tears purchasing it, but I knew that it was inevitable and had to be done. I bit the bullet after sleeping on it a night to try and get my head wrapped around the new amount and purchased it the next day.

It wasn’t til a few days late that I put it all together that my Dad had given me $1,800 which had perfectly covered my plane ticket and Visa. My biggest concern and worry now completely wiped out. All those tears I had shed in prayer about my confusion and worries about the trip now seemed so far off and I could see so clearly how the Lord has perfectly orchestrated this.

And thus, how the story unfolded.

I write this not to brag. Money is a subject that at times seems a bit secretive.  And I debated sharing this because, again, money is just a strange subject sometimes. But I am so humbled, honored and feel so blessed to see how this all unfolded. Me nor my family knew that $1800 would be the exact amount I would need, but the Lord knew the whole time.

Something I continue to learn is, our prayers never goes unheard. Just the other night I had an instance where I had to spend a sum of money that I wasn’t expecting, I was so stressed and frustrated I began to thank the Lord for being my provider and asked him to replenish the funds that had just been depleted. The next morning I woke up to a text saying someone wanted to give me almost the exact amount I had had to spend the night before. I had not even talked to them or nor did they know what I was going through.

I write this to say, no matter the circumstance the Lord is faithful. He hears our prayers whether He answers with silence or exactly what we asked for.

I am so excited about this trip. With a lot of unknowns ahead I move not in fear but in the revelation that He is faithful in all circumstances. 

21 Things I Learned at 21

My 21st year of life has been a year where I learned possibly the most about myself that I ever have. It has been one of my favorite years, but has come with its fair share of lessons and trials. This year I was out of my home country almost 6 months, almost half of my year as a 21 year old and 22 doesn’t look like that will change.

The 21 things that I have learned, some are silly, some are serious, some I have been learning for 21 years, some I learned in the past few months. But this is a nod to my 21st year, another year older, another year of learning, and another year in the never ending journey of finding out who, Abby Johnson is. 

(in no specific order)
1.Home is wherever you are, wherever that may be.

2.People respond to genuine kindness. Be more kind than necessary.

3.Never take your parents for granted. 

4.The faithfulness of the Lord never ceases.

5.Stop overpacking. You don’t need 10 t-shirts. You will thank yourself.

6.Don’t let others steal your joy. They aren’t worth it.

7.Learn new things, even if at first your terrible and it’s kind of embarrassing. 

8.It’s okay to have differing views and opinions than the majority. Don’t be afraid to voice them.  

9.Don’t let others fear become your fears.

10.Traveling and meeting people from all over the world that you would have never met otherwise, I’m convinced, is one of the most beautiful things you can experience.

11.Hurt people hurt people. 

12.Turn of your phone every now and then. Take in your surroundings. Relish in the silence. This moment only happens once.

13.You are so so capable. Nothing is impossible. Take the step and see what happens.

14.Neck pillows are such a game changer for traveling. (Don’t ask why this took 21 years to learn, I have no idea)

15.Despite what the news tells you, people are good.

16.Talk to that person you want to be friends with. It almost always pays off. 

17.Working out sucks, but is necessary when you love Nutella.

18.A plan is not always necessary. Take the steps and trust the Lord. (He got you, always)

19.Don’t forget about olives again. They are delicious.

20.Don’t let your happiness depend on anyone else.

21. Despite what society tells you, doing things alone is totally not lame. Learning to be alone, to be comfortable alone and do things alone may be the most valuable lesson I learned this year. 

Goodbye 21, you were a beautiful adventure. 

Hello 22, I already like you. 

  

Jesus and Australia

I have been traveling Australia for just shy of 4 months. I have been ‘traveling’ by myself for the last 2. I say traveling with quotes because I have been in one place, Perth Australia, the whole 2 months.

I never really thought that it would be possible to move to the literal other side of the world. Move may be a big word, mainly because I only brought enough stuff to carry on my back. But with no return ticket or return date, a steady job and home here, it may not be that great of a stretch. 

I told my dad when I left home, “I may be gone a month, I may be gone a year”, and here I am 4 months later. I could have never predicted or planned how it has unfolded. 

The last 2 months have been some of the most stretching times, but also the most rewarding. 

I have gone through the rejection process of finding a job in a foreign country, I have also defeated the process and now have a great, stable job as a live in nanny. 

I have learned that when I am weak, Jesus is my strength. This is a lesson I seem to learn over and over in different seasons of life. But it never fails to feel brand new. 

I almost gave up, threw in the towel and bought a plane ticket home at beginning of month 3. My bank account was at an all time low, I was alone in a strange city, living in a dorm with 20 strangers, and every job opportunity had fallen through. I could absolutely not see the light at the end of the tunnel. Many tears shed. I began to lean hard into Jesus, because at this point, it was just me and Him. 

I heard him say, “your not trusting me” I realized I was trying to do it all in my own strength and everything was crumbling around me. I began to proclaim His faithfulness in my life and days later I had 3 job interviews. The first one I went to was so clearly the one, I canceled the other 2 and moved in with the family 2 days later. 

Just when I was about beat up and and ready to quit, He swoops in, picks me up and whispers, I got this. 

Another thing I have leaned is, yes I can! When you tell people your plans to pick up and move across the world with no real set plan, their first reaction is fear. They tell you how brave you are, while in the back of their head thinking, I would never let my child do that. But despite that, the past 4 months have only empowered me. They have shown me how much we as individuals are capable of! I can move in and live in an apartment on the other side of the world. I can find a job in a foreign country. I can make friends and memories in the strangest of places. I can navigate a big city by myself. All this and more can happen when you step outside of the bubble of fear. 

“Don’t let the fear of others set fear in your soul. Be the fearless one I have created you to be.”

He is my bravery. 

He is my fearlessness.

He is my courage.

These are just a few of the things I have learned and experienced. I feel like I am constantly learning about myself, others and Jesus, as I navigate this crazy journey. 

I am so excited to continue as every day the route becomes more and more clear. 

Till next time 

🙂

  

May We Never Lose Our Wander

While in Hawaii, watching the sunset was an almost every night thing. We would literally run to the beach to catch it because it was so breathtaking and worth it. I remember one night we were running to catch it and I stubbed my toe and it started bleeding, but I kept running because if I stopped I would miss it. So I ran and by the time we reached the spot my toe was a mess, but I didn’t seem to care because of the beauty that surrounded me at that moment.

Coming home I almost feared I wouldn’t see the beauty here because I would be blinded by the beauty I had experienced.

But just the opposite has happened. Everyday I am taken back by the beauty that surrounds me. Just tonight I chased the sunset. I ran a large hill all by myself just to catch the tail end of it. As I sat on the hill overlooking a golf course, I was in awe. I was alone, but I didn’t feel alone. I felt His presence in the beauty that surrounded me, as the sun began to disappear and the sky filled with colors, I felt my Abba Father.

I was thinking the other day. As I drove through the mountains of Arkansas, why am I so in awe? Why am I so overwhelmed and drawn to the sky and the trees, and the fog on the river? The things that have always surrounded me, but now I feel this pull towards them.
I remembered a teaching I had in DTS about Gods Glory.

The Glory of God is God’s invisible character reflected in the visible world.

Romans 1:20
For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities – his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing God

The redeemed heart longs for beauty.

When we respond to the beauty of the world, we are responding to the Glory of God. And responding to Gods glory will enable us to see more glory. Just as when we respond to beauty, our ability to see beauty increases.

I remember the guy teaching about the Glory of God was so passionate about it. I didn’t really get it. I thought, sure I see the beauty, but I don’t feel so passionate about it.
But I get it, now.

The more I respond to the beauty, the more I see it and the more I long to sit in it, soak it all up, explore and just be in His perfect creation.

We are created for glory. We are created to reflect Gods image.

Just as we are so drawn to the beauty of the creation, the Glory of God, as should people be drawn to the reflection of Gods image and Gods beauty inside of us.

The Glory of God is everywhere, but we must open our eyes to see it.

Set aside distractions and wander.

 

 

Till next time. 🙂

W A N D E R L U S T

Traveling has changed me.

I sit here with the desire to do nothing else but go. Go anywhere.
My wandering heart can’t seem to stay still very long.

Being home is hard to bear. Knowing there is so much world I haven’t seen.

My heart is now scattered all over the world. Every person I meet on my adventures takes a piece of my heart with them. Leaving me with the pain to meet again.

The fear of the unknown no longer scares me but excites me. So i suppose its no longer a fear.

What I fear is not living my life to the fullest. Not seeing the world for what it is and not what people say it is.

But adventure isn’t in its true form without the people you cherish. Without the laughter of getting lost. Without the love of new true friendship.

I traveled to find my place. to find me. and what I’ve discovered is my place is everywhere. Im not positive i have one place.

My heart is a wanderer and i often wonder if it will ever settle. But following my heart is all I’ve ever known and all I’ve ever done.

So, Ive wandered back home now. Its bittersweet and nostalgia takes me away everyday. Ive come to terms that a beautiful season has passed a new one begins. As painful as it is.

My wings are spread for the next adventure, I’m just waiting for the wind beneath them to take me away.

Hawaiian Adventures

Well, I have made it back to the beautiful south after yet another life changing adventure.

The time I spent on the island freed me. The freedom I felt while being there is unexplainable. Not freedom as in, im away from my parents, but spiritual freedom. Like I could sore. Nothing was holding me back. The Lord revealed Himself to me in new ways and showed my things that changed me. Every adventure we took (which was a lot) I felt that unexplainable freedom, in every aspect, and so much joy. I feel like freedom and joy can go hand in hand. When you feel true freedom, the Lords freedom, you can’t help but feel joy.

I haven’t fully comprehended my time, therefore I can’t fully explain it. All I know is that I lived. And I lived without barriers. And I lived free. The joy of the Lord overtook me like a wave and I rode that wave all the way.

I met people that touched me so deeply and friends that I will now have forever all over the world. Living in community is one of my favorite things, ever. Always having someone to talk to, to laugh with, to cry with, to pray with, and to make forever memories with is such a beautiful thing (after you get over sharing a bathroom with 12 girls, not so beautiful). When you meet these people you never think you will have the crazy experiences you have with them and you especially never think you will be ugly crying saying goodbye to them. But 3 months in YWAM time is basically 3 years (probably). I feel so blessed to have met the people I did. There was never a day spontaneity, like jumping off the pier at 11 at night or trying to hitch hike to target, didn’t happen. They made the most normal of days extraordinary. And I will miss them all till the day I can squeeze there faces and smack there arms in person again. 🙂

We worked hard all week. Early mornings and hot days. Giving our all for the Fathers glory.  And then on the weekends we spread our wings and flew wherever the wind would take us. We swam with manta rays in the pitch black ocean with nothing but flashlights, some snorkel gear and a noodle. We hiked to one of Hawaiis tallest waterfalls with no clear direction, crossing rivers that were up to our necks, and holding backpacks above our heads. Hiked through the hawaiian rainforest and walked through pitch black tunnels that go through the mountain to bring us to a “waterslide”. Piled 6 girls in a 5 person rental car drove without a destination making it all the way around the island and slept on a random beach that to this day we could not take you back to because we wouldn’t be able to find it. Jumped off the 40 foot cliff at the Southern most point of the US. The countless hitchhiking adventures, where the thrill of being picked up never gets old. Swam with 30 sea turtles in one day, making sea turtles possibly my new favorite animal. Driving to a beach, taking a swim in the ocean at sunset and sleeping on that beach with laughter that makes you cry and sand for days, everywhere. Snorkeling and waiting in the middle of the ocean for dolphins, making “dolphin noises” and laughing so hard you start to drown a little. Waking up at 3am piling too many people in the bed of a truck and driving to the tallest mountain in Hawaii for sunrise.

These are just a few of the adventures and countless memories that were made. Where freedom and joy overcame me in the Lords perfect creations. These last 3 months were some of the most beautiful months of my life and won’t soon, or ever be forgotten.

Til next time. 🙂

Aloha!

Aloha!

Welp, living in the great state of Hawaii for a little over a month now and thought I would do some updating and filling in. I have no idea where to begin because the amount of stuff that has been packed into this month is insane.

So, to clarify what I am actually doing here, I am working on the YWAM base here in Kona. I work on grounds (raking, watering plants and such) and in the mailroom (sorting all the mail the base gets, printing, ect.) 5 days a week. Its a lot of work, but when you look at it knowing that this work is not for my own gain at all but all for the Lord and for His glory, it makes it worth it. We as a group work in all facets at the base, ranging from the kitchen to construction. Day by day we grow closer as a group making memories, serving the Lord and becoming Ohana.

We also get to attend weekly worship, teachings and ministry nights at the base with the whole campus. It is a beautiful time worshiping with people from all over the world in many languages, growing closer to the Lord and experiencing Him in ways I never have. Its such a reminder how huge our God is.

So thats monday through friday. The weekends are for major adventures. Like jumping off the southern most point of the US, walking lava rock to get to secluded beaches, hitch hiking and piling into the back of trucks on the highways. There hasn’t been a weekend yet that I haven’t come out of it sunburn, but it is so worth it.

Living here reminds me what living is. Living to me is doing things you’ve never done and doing things you never thought you would do. To never take a moment for granted and seize EVERY moment. And to inject joy and laughter into every situation. All wrapped up with REAL relationships. With God and with others! To cherish the moment and people you are with and to praise the Lord for blessing me with the moment and people I am with.

The thought that keeps coming to my mind whether I am watching a Hawaiian sunset or watering fruit trees, is that I am blessed. The journey the Lord has brought me on the past year is unimaginable. If someone would have told me 2 years ago that all this would have happened, I would have never believed them. God is so big and so cool and His blessings are far more than we can ever imagine.

So thats my life at the moment. Suffering for Jesus in Hawaii. 😉

But really, I am having the time of my life, growing closer to the Lord, learning more about myself, others and the Lord. Its a once in a life time experience and I am cherishing every moment.

So, thats all for now.

til next time. 🙂

PS: {Here is a formal apology saying, I am sorry if I haven’t been in great contact or contact at all with you. Life is crazy busy here. But don’t you worry, I will be home in 2 months and will have all the time in the world to chat and update. Also, I hope to update more on facebook or just at least post pictures soon. Like I said, crazy busy. ha}

Wandering Heart

Yesterday I got a call from an unknown number. I very rarely answer these calls, mainly cause it takes me back to junior high and I expect someone on the other end to ask if my refrigerator is running. But, I answered it and I heard sweet words that I had been praying to hear, “Hi is this Abby? This is (i forgot his name) calling from YWAM in Kona Hawaii.”

Days before I had been crying outside in my back yard sitting by the fire because I was so stressed and beat down by life. Just from one thing to another is what it felt like. I had applied for this program 2 months before and felt my chances of getting in were gone. I was sad about it because not only is it a place I want to go, it is time I felt like I needed so desperately to get away for a little while, be with Jesus, serve others and just be.

I know my life is weird to people. Some can’t wrap there minds around the fact that I’m not going to college, in fact it plain scares people. Some don’t agree with me traveling all the time. Some fear for my future. But let me enlighten you, I’m truly not scared or nervous as to where my future is going so you shouldn’t be either. College was never for me and I knew that from a early age, traveling and serving Jesus was my thing. I am breaking out of the mold that i’ve never fit in anyway. Maybe I won’t have a big great college degree or a high paying job when I’m older but i’m okay with that. Im fulfilling my dreams now and I will never regret it. Im serving Jesus now and I will never regret that. I know that the Lord knows what my future looks like and I fully trust Him with it.

So after saying allll that. I am going to Kona, Hawaii with YWAM doing a volunteer program. I will be serving others and serving the organization in any way they need. I will be leaving in almost exactly 1 month and will be gone for 3 months. I am so excited for this experience but also nervous leaving some things behind here. But I know the Lord is calling me there. And I trust Him.

My heart is a wanderer. I would regret it if I didn’t take this time of my life to travel and experience things. The quote “Not all who wander are lost” is me. It may look to others that I’m just wandering about seemingly lost. but I’m not lost at all, I’m exploring and making the most of life while I can all while trying to spread the name of Jesus.

Yes my life is very different from people my age. But I’m perfectly okay with that. I am a big advocate for following your dreams and enjoying your life. and that is exactly what I’m doing.

Aloha. 🙂

Tattoos and Life

People ask me. How was your trip? Did you have so much fun? Was is it life changing?

and I just smile and say yes, because it would take me another 6 months to tell them everything, and lets be honest, they don’t really care. But the things that I expected to change me, impacted me, but it was the small things that changed me.

One particular instance, was while we were in Bosnia. We were working with local street children at a place where they could come, learn basic school, eat 3 meals, get showers and clean clothes, all while either they were supposed to be begging on the streets or their parents where on the streets begging for money. These children were as sweet as can be, spoke very little to no english, but just wanted to be loved. Its quite amazing how even when you don’t speak the same language you can communicate.

The main religion of Bosnia is Muslim, and they don’t have very good thoughts of Christians because thats what there last war was about, religion. So we come to Bosnia, 8 girls, that have never been there before prepared to speak the gospel.

So we are sitting with the children, playing a card game that lasted probably 3 hours. (haha) And I of course had short sleeves on because it was boiling outside, and I have a cross tattooed on my wrist, and the boy I am sat beside points to my tattoo and says no. I turn to the boy on my other side that speaks more english than the rest, but still very little, and ask him to tell the other boy its a cross, He tells him and the boy says to cover my tattoo up because it is a cross. Of course at this point I am a little taken back and shocked. I tell him, no, i wont cover it up and he began to talk to his friends in Bosnian pointing at my wrist and laughing. I then begin to tell the boy that speaks a little bit of english why and what the cross means, he lost interest quite quick, probably because he didn’t understand.

I always thought when a situation like this came to me, I would know just what to say, I would know how to handle it, but I didn’t.

I never got my tattoo with the thought, ‘oh one day I am going to get persecuted for this’, I didn’t even put much thought in to it. I knew I wanted it because its a reminder of what the Lord did for me everyday but not much thought past that. But then this happens. And it shook me for a couple days. I began to be very self aware of it, as before I hardly noticed it. I began to cover it up. But the Lord began to speak to me about it. He just reminded me, He is nothing to be ashamed of, I chose to follow Him, and I chose to tattoo Him on body.

No name is above Him. He is my protector.

I was there to spread His name to the ends of the earth, whether with my mouth, my actions, or even a simple cross on my wrist.  And that simple, small, encounter changed my view of something that has been marked on my body forever.

Because Jesus bears my sins everyday of my life, because He forgives me and wipes my slate clean everyday day of my life, because he has the deepest and most unconditional love for me everyday of my life. I deserve none of it, but He continues to hold me together day after day.

And because of all of that, I strive to live my life in His image everyday. To show not only with my mouth but with my actions who the Savior of my life is.

The small cross on my wrist represents why I wake up everyday. Why I am the way that I am.

Because I am saved from the things of this world by a God who knows me better than anyone ever will.

Cheers. 🙂

Lets get real.

Its 1 am and Im gonna be real with you. Get ready.

So, you come back from a trip of a life time. You have no idea what to expect home life to be like. After 6 months of constant motion, jumping from country to country, you get home. You get past the jet lag and the feeling that America is abnormally large and your life begins to slow down. Slow wayyy down.

You (I) feel a bit empty. Nobody but yourself truly knows what you’ve just been through (a whirlwind). And you begin to notice that. And after the intial excitement of coming home, things go back. People go back. And you. don’t know where you fit anymore.

Lets be honest. I went to YWAM (youth with a mission) to find direction for my life. I got so much more out of the process, a deeper stronger relationship with the Lord, revelation, experience, memories to last a life time, best friends, but the one thing I didn’t get. direction for my life. Im not disappointed. Im not let down. I am beyond thrilled with what the Lord has done for me and is doing with me. But, I was confused.

I may have had breakdowns and blow ups, but I am fully confident the Lord can handle them. Even when I am in my car and its just me and God and I am asking the Lord why. In those moments, the weak moments, where I feel useless, burdened and a burden all at the same time, the Lord whispers and lets me know in your weakness, I am strong. In those moments all there’s left to do is let go (Jesus take the wheel. we were all thinking it.) and trust the Lord, because thats the only option. Literally the only option.

So, I have come to the letting go (everyday). I have realized that I am not in control. I have given the Lord the reins to do what You will. I am confident He knows me, He knows my hopes, dreams and the desires of my heart and He says to take delight in Him and HE will give me the desires of my heart. So with that promise, why would I know trust him. 🙂

So, this is getting a bit lengthy and all that you just read, was not my plan to write at all but, look there it is. 😉

My whole point of writing was to say. The Lord has really been putting on my heart to seek Him, to really SEEK Him, and I felt when I began doing this, things would shift, doors would open and opportunity would rise. So thats just what I did. I have been searching and seeking the Lord and in the midst finding such comfort and peace.

Day after day of seeking. The Lord is faithful. Doors have slowly began to open. He has given me a new hope. My life still may look like a bit of a scattered mess with not much purpose from the outside, but on the inside I can say things are being stacked and organized day by day by the One who is my strength. By the One who is my purpose.

I am confident that He is faithful.

My brain threw up a little on this page. But I hope it makes sense, if not, im not even sorry, I did say this blog was for myself. 😉

Cheers from a girl that is still very scatter brained.

Til next time. ❤